So I’m a month into my #NoShoppingForAYear challenge and I’m really proud that I haven’t caved as of yet. It’s so hard though as I can really see my bad habits. Like I automatically go straight to the clothes aisles in Sainsbury’s as it was unusual for me to go food shopping and not buy some piece of clothing. And they’ve just got a load of new stock in, and with it all being about ‘dopamine dressing‘ it’s really hard for my brain to walk past it. ADHDers in particular search out dopamine, as we tend to not be able to regulate it well, so are constantly searching for ways to increase it. But so far I’ve managed. I’m also used to nipping into Primark every now and again, just to see what they have. I’ve managed not to do this as of yet!
It’s really interesting to me just how much I rely on ‘buying’ things as a way to increase my dopamine. I’ll also wear what I buy immediately and for the next few weeks it becomes my ‘new best thing’, then onto the next and it’ll get lost amongst the rest of my previous new best things! I see this in the boys too, especially F and Sam. So trying no shopping for a year is a tough call.
I have a spare room full of clothes that I managed to buy during lockdown. A lot of them either don’t fit (some never fitted!). Or, worse still, have tags on and I’ve never even worn them. So I’m trying to work through it all, although it’s a lot easier to ignore. I need to split it into 4 piles:
- To keep
- To sell
- To donate to charity
- To throw away
It’s a little overwhelming at the moment, but it needs doing. So that is my aim for February, I’ll keep you updated.
The man from the L.A, he says Yes!
In other news, the L.A has confirmed Sam’s school place for Sept and we got our named school, so that is a huge weight off my mind. We finally (6 months delayed from the already 12 months waiting list) had his ADHD assessment, but it was only the initial assessment. So it meant filling in all the forms again as obviously a lot can change in 18 months, and has. We now have another waiting game -approx. 5-6 months- before he gets his final assessment/diagnosis. It would be really good to have that diagnosis in place before he starts school in Sept. But we’ll just have to wait and see, and hope for no more delays.
My assessment is not looking any closer at all, still have not heard a word. It’s been so long that I can’t remember exactly when I was referred. And I’m beginning to wonder whether I should look at the ‘right to choose’ option to see if it might be quicker. If anyone out there has used this route I’d love to hear from you, comment below and I’ll get in touch.
We seem to be in a pretty good place at the moment, family-wise. I’ve spent a lot of time learning about our brains and just being a little easier on all of us, including myself. Trying to understand the boys and work with them, to help them get the best out of themselves. It’s not easy and sometimes I literally could scream, but actually knowing that nothing is deliberate or done with any kind of malice or choice as such, makes it a little easier to take.
Are you an ND parent of ND kids? How do you find the right balance? What works for you all?
Anyway, wish me luck in the mammoth task that is my clothes mountain… If you don’t hear from me, I could have been buried under it LOL.